- Previewing the stages of dog development
- Making sure that your puppy’s basic needs are met
- Communicating by using the language of a pup
- Establishing who’s in charge of the household
- Discovering how to train your puppy from his perspective
- Comparing hierarchy to democracy
Puppy
Because most adopted dogs are puppies, this chapter puts a lot of emphasis on puppies, but you’ll find useful information about older dogs as well.
Recognizing the Eight Stages of Dog Development
Infancy (8 to 12 weeks)
The terrible twos (12 to 16 weeks)
Remember
Puppies at this stage are starting to learn things, whether they’re guided or not. If you don’t train your puppy, she’ll train you.
The budding adolescent (16 to 24 weeks)
Puppy puberty (6 to 9 months)
The trying teen (9 to 12 months)
Warning!
This stage often brings with it a subtle campaign of defiance. You may not think a sloppy, sideways sit is a very big deal, but your dog makes a little mental check mark every time you let him get away with something. You can’t relax your efforts just yet!
The young adult (12 to 24 months)
The adult dog (2 to 8 years)
The senior dog (8 years and older)
Understanding Your Puppy’s Basic Needs
Puppy
Your puppy is a lot like a human baby. Okay, sure, your pup may have a furry coat, a curly tail, and a full set of teeth, but many of the differences stop there. Like a child, your puppy has basic needs and an instinct to satisfy them. A baby communicates his helpless neediness through crying. It’s a guardian’s role to interpret the cry and satisfy the need. In essence, a cry indicates that the baby lacks the ability to associate a specific need with a bodily sensation. When he’s hungry, his belly hurts. When he’s tired, his brain shuts down. When he’s thirsty, his throat constricts. If these needs aren’t satisfied, he gets anxious. When a loving caregiver routinely satisfies his needs, without stress, discipline, or confusion, he develops a strong bond with that person.
Tip
You can help your puppy identify his needs by pairing directions with routines. Whereas a child develops language and a more civilized approach to communicating her requests, your puppy will develop his own system of communicating by prompting the routine. Read about puppy needs in the upcoming sections, and use Table 7-1 to create your own routines — your puppy will be ringing the bell to go outside in no time!
Remember
Whoever satisfies a need is held in high regard. Though it may take some time for your puppy to “pay you back” with his love and devotion, each passing day brings you closer to that ultimate connection. Need by need, your bond will grow.
Table 7-1 Needs Chart |
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Your Puppy’s Need
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The Word or Phrase You Say
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The Routine You Follow
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Eating
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“Hungry” or “Eat”
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Schedule feeding times. Place the bowl in the same spot and encourage your puppy to sit before feeding.
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Drinking
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“Water”
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Keep the bowl in the same spot. Encourage him to sit before drinking.
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Going potty
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“Outside,” “Papers,” “Go potty,” or “Get busy”
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Encourage your puppy to nose/paw a bell to signal this need. Follow the same route to the same potty spot. Restrict attention until your puppy goes.
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Sleeping
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“On your mat,” “In your crate,” or “Time for bed”
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Designate one spot in each shared room. Take your pup to his mat or bed, provide a chew toy, and secure if necessary.
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Playing
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“Bone,” “Ball,” “Toy,” or “Go play!”
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Establish a play area inside and outside the house. Make sure all four paws are on the floor before you toss a toy or give a bone.
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Eating
Table 7-2 Your Puppy’s Feeding Schedule
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Age
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Morning Meal (7 a.m.)
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Midday Meal (11:30 a.m.)
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Afternoon Meal (4 p.m.)
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Late Evening Meal
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8 to 10 weeks
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*
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*
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*
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*
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10 weeks to 4 months
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*
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*
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*
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4 to 6 months
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*
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*
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Remember
Whoever feeds your puppy should follow the same organized routine that you do. Puppies (like kids) are happiest when they know exactly what will happen next.
Drinking
Tip
Establish a drinking station for your puppy and keep her dish there whether it’s empty or full. Give your puppy water with her meals; after playing, chewing, or napping; or as you’re on your way to her potty area.
If you’re forgetful, it’s better to fill his dish and leave it out for her throughout the day. Though it may delay your housetraining, it’s better than having her go thirsty.
Tip
Restrict water after 7:30 p.m., unless you want to be up all night taking your puppy outside. If your puppy clearly needs a drink, either give her a small amount (no more than a cup for a large dog or a quarter cup for a small fry) or offer a couple ice cubes.
Sleeping
Tip
Like kids, some puppies have a hard time putting themselves to sleep, especially when excitement levels are high. If you have kids, ask them to baby him by staying quiet until he’s sleeping. Each time he seems tired, escort him to his resting area while saying a cue word like “Bed.” Eventually, he’ll go to this area on his own when he’s tired.
Going potty
Tip
For a lot more on housetraining, see Chapter Housetraining 101.
Playing
Remember
How you play with your young puppy determines your long-term relationship. Rough, confrontational games, such as wrestling or tug of war, communicate confrontation, which can be detrimental to your relationship. A confronted puppy will be more likely to challenge you and ignore your direction. Games such as the two-ball toss, soccer, and name games instill cooperation and a fun-loving attitude — this puppy won’t ever want to leave your side.
Speaking Doglish and Presenting Yourself As Top Dog
Warning!
If you don’t organize the team hierarchy, your dog will, and that can be a real nightmare. If your dog has the personality to lead, you’ll find yourself living in a very expensive doghouse under dog rule. If your dog doesn’t have the personality to lead but feels like she has to because no one else is, you’ll end up with perhaps an even bigger headache, because dogs in this state are very hyper and confused.
- Eye contact
- Body language
- Tone
Remember
Figuring out Doglish may seem like hard work, but watching the techniques in action is quite fascinating. Your dog will respond to you more willingly if you make the effort to understand and use her language. With an ounce of effort, a little time, and some structure, you can earn your dog’s respect, cooperation, and trust. Plus, you’ll have a teammate who will be at your side when the cards are down. You can’t beat that bargain.
Eye contact: Attention = affirmation
Remember
When you make eye contact with your dog, you reinforce whatever behavior he’s actively engaged in. Look your well-behaved dog in the eye and guess what you get? You got it: a well-behaved dog. However, if you make eye contact while he’s running around the house with a wet wash rag flopping from his mouth, you’ll reinforce that behavior because you’re giving him the attention he so desperately wants. He wants you to look at him, so if you do so while he’s eating your favorite album, he learns to do that.
Tip
The bottom line is this: Make eye contact only when your dog is calm (in the 1–8 zone).
Body language: Stand up and stay calm
Remember
Body language is an integral part of Doglish. Play, tension, relaxation — they all have different postures. Your dog doesn’t quite grasp the “I’m pushing you frantically because I’m unhappy with your greeting manners” concept. By dealing with the situation in this way, you’re communicating differently than you think you are. In fact, by pushing and shouting, you’re actually copying her body language, which reinforces her behavior.
Tip
As you blaze the training trail, remember these guidelines:
– Stand upright and relax when directing your dog. When giving your puppy direction or a command, throw your shoulders back and stand tall like a peacock. Tell your family and friends about this peacock position, and start strutting your stuff.
– Don’t face off or chase your puppy when you’re mad. She’ll only think you’re playing.
– When you’re trying to quiet or direct your puppy, stay calm.
– Always remember that you set the example.
Remember
Can you ever get down and play or cuddle with your puppy or dog? Of course you can! Just don’t play with your puppy when she’s in a mischievous mood, or you’re asking for trouble.
Tone: Using the three D’s
Remember
Commit three tones to memory — the three D’s:
– Delighted: Use this tone when you want to praise your dog. It should soothe him, not excite him. Find a tone that makes your pup feel warm and proud inside.
– Directive: Use this tone for your commands. It should be clear and authoritative, not harsh or sweet. Give your commands once from the Peacock Position.
If you bend over when giving your dog a command, don’t be surprised if he doesn’t listen. You’re doing the doggy equivalent of a play bow, which is a posture that invites a game. When giving your dog directions, stand tall and proud like a peacock.
– Discipline: You may not be much of a disciplinarian, but you should have a few tones that tell your dog to back off or move on. The word you use doesn’t matter as much as the tone. The tone should be shaming or disapproving, such as “How could you?” or “You’d better not touch that.” Discipline has to do with timing and tone.
Teaching kids how to use the proper toneIf you have kids, you’ve probably noticed that sometimes they call out to the puppy in a very high-pitched tone, and sometimes they don’t pronounce commands properly, either.
Until kids are 12 years old, you’re better off focusing on what they’re doing right rather than homing in on their imperfections. Simply overenunciate all your commands so that the kids figure out how to pronounce them properly and in an appropriate tone. If you overenunciate each command, your kids will notice the effects and start mimicking you. And when your kids copy your intonations, they transfer the control from you to them.
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Tip
Don’t repeat your commands. Saying “Sit, sit, sit, Boomer, sit! Sit! Sit!” sounds different from “Sit” — which is what Boomer is used to. If you want your dog to listen when you give the first command, make sure that you give it only once; then reinforce your expectations by positioning your dog. (When positioning in a sit, remember to gently squeeze the waist muscles and lift up on your dog’s collar.)
Gimme, Gimme, Gimme: Puppies Want All the Attention
Puppy
Imagine being a puppy, with humans just being big dogs milling all about, jabbering away in some nonsensical language, and providing virtually no instruction on what to do. When you lay a head in their lap or paw at them inquisitively, the human may shoo you off or lay a warm hand on your head, while often continuing to ignore your request for direction. The talking box on the wall and hand-held objects hold more interest for the humans than your interaction does. You hear noise and more noise. You catch sniffs that can’t be explored or trailed. And you see sights that you’re expected to ignore. Being a puppy in a human’s world can be tough.
The power of positive attention
Remember
Dogs are drawn to positive energy fields. Think of yourself as her teacher and mentor. If you keep up the cheer, your dog won’t want to be anywhere else.
Why negative attention doesn’t work
Remember
Dogs often interpret negative attention as confrontational play: “You’re animated, you’re loud, and you’re fierce. Let’s play rough!” Out-of-control negative attention reinforces the very behavior you’re trying to change. To resolve these problems, be patient and read on.
Showing Your Pup How to Live in a Human World
Remember
A lot goes into being a good dog trainer, and most of it’s mental. Dogs, like humans, have spirits that you must understand and encourage in ways that make sense to the dog. Your dog has bestowed on you the highest honor, and it’s one you’d never receive from a human: a lifetime commitment to respect your judgment and abide by your rules. You need only show her how.
- Accepts and modifies his own personality
- Never blames the pup
- Recognizes the pup’s unique personality
Recognize and modify your personality
Warning!
If you discover that you’re demanding, say, and your dog is sweet, someone’s going to have to change. Making too many demands on a sweet dog will only frighten him, and he’ll shut down or run away when training begins. If you’re compulsive and you have a laid-back dog, you’ll be laughed at. Have you ever seen a dog laugh at his owner? It’s quite embarrassing. For you to be a good dog trainer, you must modify your expectations to better suit your dog’s personality.
Never blame the pup
Warning!
Never run at your puppy. Racing headlong toward a puppy is scary. Visualize someone two to four times your size barreling down on you. Talk about overwhelming. Your puppy may collapse in fear or run from you, but she won’t take anything useful from the situation. Consider other options, such as using treats to reinforce good behavior.
Recognize the pup’s unique personality
Remember
No matter what his personality, your pup needs to interact and be understood. Dogs love to share their secret language with you, and they’re content staying close to you as long as you include them in your daily activities.
If dogs ran the worldOnly recently have people expected dogs to adjust to long periods of alone time. For most of the 20th century, no leash laws existed — hard to imagine, but true. Dogs were left out on the back porch during the day and often left to run free at night.
Long ago, most dogs weren’t even considered pets. They were domesticated and bred to aid man in tasks that clearly advanced society, from herding sheep, to guarding property and towns, to hauling supplies in wagons or sleds.
The evolution of dogs as “pets” has come with the expectation that they put their working genes to rest (which isn’t entirely possible), as well as a growing awareness of their psychological and emotional needs. Most dogs have retired from their genetic jobs.
Dogs so completely identify with their group or team that few would even know how to cope if left on their own. Ask various breeds what they’d do if they were suddenly put out on the street, and although you may get different answers, none would much enjoy their independence:
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Recognize your dog’s behavior patterns, understand his communication style, and adjust your approach to teaching him how to behave. You need to talk Doglish and look at your current situation from his point of view. This chapter also helps you get a handle on everyday life immediately, from civilizing your dog’s manners to deescalating mismanaged behaviors, such as hyperactivity, assertiveness, fear, and impulsivity.
Understanding How Hierarchy Differs from Democracy
It’s in their genes
Tip
Teach your dog three directions that you can use whenever he looks to you for direction:
- Get your ball.
- Let’s find your bone!
- Sit/settle down.
Remember
When your dog stares at you, he is often looking for guidance, but constant adoration makes your dog restless. Acting out soon follows, often in the form of house-soiling, destructive chewing, or stealing objects.
Asserting benevolent authority
Tip
Your dog is preprogrammed to accept direction, so in many ways, you’re already ahead of the game.
Defining your space
– Teach your dog “Excuse me.” Your dog identifies your relationship based on spatial deference: Either you move out of her way or she moves out of yours. Teach her to respect your space immediately. If she’s in your way, say, “Excuse me,” and nudge her gently with your foot until she moves. If she cuts in front of you, walk straight into her until she shifts out of your way. Is she leaning against you excessively or inappropriately? Say, “Excuse me,” and use your leg to push her off until she respects your personal space.
– Condition your dog to lie on the sidelines. Does your dog always position herself underfoot? Aside from being dangerous, her intrusion is a cry for attention. Provide her with a proper area in each room of your house and identify it with bedding and toys. If she’s reluctant to stay there, check out the upcoming “Assign play stations in each room” section.
Warning!
If you ask your dog to move and she growls at you, stop. This action is a sign that it’s time to pick up the phone immediately and call for professional help. Actively aggressive behaviors require expertise that may go beyond the scope of this book — although you can read more about aggression in Chapter What Are Dogs and Why Do They Behave That Way? and Chapter Teaching Your Dog Manners
Remember
Encourage all your friends and family to take part in your efforts to civilize your dog. If your dog ignores any of them, step in to reinforce their directions. Your dog must learn to respect everyone.
Giving direction
– Name: Help your dog create a positive association with his name. Call out your dog’s name whenever you come home or to highlight a positive moment, such as when you’re offering a treat, loving pats, or playtime with a favorite toy.
Warning!
Don’t call your dog for unpleasant activities, such as isolation or unwanted grooming. If you do, he may hear “Come” and think “Run!” If “Come” has a reverse effect, stop using it. Use a treat cup and also check out the other training techniques in Part IV. Of course, you could just keep your dog on leash.
Tip
Call your dog as you’re walking away from him or when you’re hidden from sight, to pique his interest. Shake a cup of treats while saying his name, to encourage his enthusiasm for listening and following you. Though initially he’ll respond for the food, you’ll eventually condition a positive cooperative habit. Ultimately, you can phase out food treats and replace them with praise and petting.
– Ball and/or toy: Often during the day, your dog may look to you for ideas. If you say nothing, his restlessness may lead to mischief. Instead, teach him these words. Each time you play with him or give him a chew, repeat a word like “Toy” or “Bone.”
– Sit/please: A dog who sits politely is, in essence, saying “Please.” Teach your dog to sit either by enticing him with a treat held near his nose and moved back over his head, or by placing pressure on his waist muscles with your thumb and forefinger as you put gentle upward pressure under his chin.
Tip
Teach your dog that he must sit before rewards, food, or attention.
– Wait/okay: This direction tells your dog to freeze and wait for your next cue. Use it at thresholds and curbs or when entering or exiting your home, a building, or your car. To teach it, either control your dog on a leash or hold him steady, pulling back as you say, “Wait”; then release him with “Okay.”
– Follow me: This direction simply reminds your dog that you’re the leader and will make all the directional decisions for both of you. More than a dominance gesture, your leadership efforts convey your willingness to be his guardian and protector.
– Settle down: This direction encourages your dog to relax. As often as possible, direct your dog to a mat or comfortable rug/bed and provide him with a displacement activity, such as a bone or toy, which will distract him and keep him from idly wandering about. You can use it both in your home or when traveling about. Whether your dog is restless at your dinner hour or quiet time, or you’re waiting your turn at the veterinarian, this familiar direction will give your dog a sense of calm.
Don’t be afraid to use a leashYou may be saying: “I want my dog to join me, but he’s so unmanageable. We try, but after a short bit, we have no choice but to shut him away by himself again. If he’d learn to behave,
he’d get a lot more freedom.”
If the thought of letting your dog loose leaves you shaking in your shoes, you’ve probably gotten yourself caught in a vicious cycle. You may not realize that, ironically, the prolonged periods of isolation are resulting in your dog’s impulsivity and mischief.
One solution is to use your leash indoors. Find an appropriate training collar (see Chapter Basic Training and Beyond), and use a collar-and-leash ensemble to lead him through your home. Use the directions in this chapter to teach him his manners and socialize him to each room.
The leash is not a cruel device; think of it as akin to holding a child’s hand. What’s cruel and confusing is forced isolation. When your dog is cooperating, let him drag the leash behind him so that you can easily grab it, if needed, for additional control. When you’re sure that his manners have improved and he’s acting civilly, you can dispense with the leash — but not before you’re certain that it’s no longer needed.
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Establishing your social status
Assign play stations in each room
Tip
Think of providing your dog with a play station like offering a guest in your home a chair. Your dog doesn’t know where to go in your house until you tell him; when you do, he’ll feel welcome, calm, and included. If you don’t, he’ll likely misbehave, which provokes your negative attention. Because your negative reaction can be interpreted as a controlled or restrained confrontation, your dog may think his freedom is an invitation to play.
If you have to isolate him now but want him to share, say, the whole house or the downstairs area, take strides immediately toward this goal.
You may as well call this area a play station.
Bring him into the room on a leash if he’s too fidgety and say, “Settle down,” as you lead him to his play station. Sit with him and encourage him to focus on his things. Give him lots of attention and feed him treats.
Tip
Bring your dog with you to these places often. If he won’t stay at his play station, make sure that he’s had a good romp and time to potty, and then hold him still with a leash or secure a leash to something immovable.
Restraint at the door
Initially, manage her on a leash and teach her to properly respond to the directions “Wait” and then “Okay.”
Ignore your dog if she behaves in an overexcited or inappropriate manner when you or other family members arrive. If she has been confined alone in a crate, pen, or room, don’t speak to her until she has calmed down or is chewing on a toy. After she has calmed down considerably, brace her as you greet her (see Figure 7-1), with your thumb clipped over the underside of her collar to prevent her from jumping up.
Warning!
If your dog doesn’t stay put when no one is present, she won’t sit still when other people are. In this case, affix a leash to an immovable object. When you send her back from the door, secure her on the leash. Practice doing this routine when no one is there, and then with your family, and each time someone calls. Release your dog after you’ve welcomed the visitor, but only when she has calmed down.
Remember
The goal is for your dog to mirror and mimic your response to newcomers. Your dog isn’t the leader — you are. You can shape her responses by establishing your authority in this way.
Was that out of spite?Do you think your dog behaves poorly out of spite? Think again. Dogs repeat behavior that get them attention (good or bad) and often act out of anxiety when left alone, but they don’t
react out of spite.
Dogs aren’t dishonest or mean. The conclusion that your dog is vengeful will do nothing for your relationship — such thoughts only result in bad energy in the home. Ask not what your dog is doing wrong, but what you may not be doing right.
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